Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Come back, Little Namee

I was at Disney World recently and knew that the Jungle Cruise had just reopened not long ago after being closed for a refurbishment. I was looking forward to seeing the Florida version of the attraction spruced up and looking fine.

Instead, we enjoyed as our Skipper (earning his ears) deftly covered for the immobile, normally dancing, natives by explaining that this was a rare tribe that sleeps standing up.

The tiger in the temple was missing too, and if you look for him long enough (but not THAT long, really), you'll catch a glimpse of a rare jungle ladder.

Worst of all, though, was that Chief Namee himself was not there. It's bad enough that WDW's Jungle Cruise has that long empty period after the elephants when the skippers generally point out the plant life, but without the Chief, the attraction really plods to an unsatisfying conclusion. The headhunter and cannibal jokes about the chief are some of the best of the ride.

Most likely, this is just a temporary leave of absence, and the Chief will be back conducting his perpetual two-for-one sale soon.

Some theories about where he might be in the meantime:

- Hiding out since he heard Disneyland's Trader Sam put a hit out on him as part of their ongoing East Coast/West Coast rivalry.

- Aggressively attempting to recruit new employees away from their current employers (hmm... I know there's a more concise term for that. What is it again?)

- Suffering from severe brain freeze from all the Dole Whips he ate during the refurb.

- Studying for a degree in psychology just so he can introduce himself as a head-shrinking shrunken head dealer.

- Checking out his favorite clubs on Pleasure Island before they close for good. Sure, he likes The Adventurer's Club, but he's always felt most at home at Mannequins.

Come home soon, Chief. We miss you.

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